The easiest way to say ‘no’ to something you don’t want to do

Michelle Woo
Forge
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1 min readJun 14, 2021

🤷 Tip: When you need to say “no” to something, say you have a rule.

If you need an easy and straightforward way to decline a request—perhaps an acquaintance on Facebook is asking if you want to hear about their latest MLM business or a colleague has just invited you to an event that starts at 8 p.m.—Ryan Holiday suggests saying you have a rule, something he learned from Nerd Fitness founder Steve Kamb.

Holiday writes on Forge: “‘I have a rule that I don’t decide on the phone.’ ‘I have a rule that I don’t accept gifts.’ ‘I have a rule that I don’t speak for free anymore.’ ‘I have a rule that I am home for bath time with the kids every night.’ People respect rules, and they accept that it’s not you rejecting the offer, request, demand, or opportunity, but the rule allows you no choice.”

🚫 More from Forge on building better boundaries:

It’s Time to Build a ‘Happiness Fence’
Read more >>

Going Remote Is Forcing Us to Finally Talk About Work Boundaries
Read more >>

The Boundary You Didn’t Know You Were Missing
Read more >>

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Forge
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Published in Forge

A former publication from Medium on personal development. Currently inactive and not taking submissions.

Michelle Woo
Michelle Woo

Written by Michelle Woo

Author of Horizontal Parenting: How to Entertain Your Kid While Lying Down (Chronicle Books)