Stop Trying to Make People Grow Up

A therapist explains the power of focusing on your own maturity

Kathleen Smith
Forge

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Photo: rbkomar/Getty Images

When anxiety is high, the more we fixate on the behaviors of others. Maybe you try to teach your partner to dress better, or lecture your father on how to be a better listener. You’re more likely to be embarrassed by your children’s bad behavior or frustrated with a colleague’s inefficiency. If…

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Kathleen Smith
Forge

Kathleen Smith is a therapist and author of the books Everything Isn’t Terrible and True to You. She writes about anxiety, relationships, and Bowen theory.