A perspective shift to become more persuasive

Cari Nazeer
Forge
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2 min readJul 11, 2020
Photo: Westend61/Getty Images

💬 Today’s tip: To change someone’s mind, ask: “If I believed what they believed, what would make me question my belief?”

These days, many of us are desperately trying to change friends and family members’ minds on issues we’re passionate about — like the police system, our president, or wearing masks. But emotion rarely works, as Barry Davret notes; in fact, it can make your counterpart defensive.

For large-scale protest, emotion is key. But for one-on-one discussions, a collegial approach is crucial. So start your argument with empathy. Make a list of what it would take to change your mind if the roles were reversed: the ways you’d need the issue framed, the kinds of evidence you’d want, the biases you’d feel when hearing from the other side.

Davret’s recommendation: “Research examples of people who have already changed their opinion and find out what caused them to make the switch. Check out the Change My View community on Reddit, where people post opinions they accept may be flawed in an effort to understand other perspectives on the issue.”

📚 More from Forge on having challenging conversations:

How to Talk to Someone Who’s Been Through Some S%$#
Read more >>

The One Word That Can End Any Argument
Read more >>

How to Talk About Literally Anything Other Than the Pandemic
Read more >>

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Published in Forge

A former publication from Medium on personal development. Currently inactive and not taking submissions.

Cari Nazeer
Cari Nazeer

Written by Cari Nazeer

Former lead editor, Forge @ Medium

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