You’ll Never Get What You Want If You’re Too Scared to Ask For It

A story about being brave in moments that matter

Michael Thompson
Forge
Published in
4 min readJan 7, 2020

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Photo: PeopleImages/Getty

The woman sat at her kitchen table staring at the four names. In this moment, despite her 83 years, she felt like a nervous teenager. She couldn’t believe what she was doing.

Months earlier, while walking the Camino de Santiago, a 500-mile trek across northern Spain, she’d met a man. It seemed to be just another friendly encounter with a stranger, one of many she’d had since arriving in the country. The conversation had lasted only a few minutes, and they parted without exchanging names.

But when she eventually made her way back to her home in Norway, she couldn’t stop thinking about that man. There was just something about him… something kind, maybe. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but she knew she wanted to see him again.

When she’d originally planned her trip, meeting someone new was the last thing on her mind. She’d decided to go on the walk to help her come to grips with the passing of her husband. It was a way for her to reenter the world after being deep in despair for so long. Yet she kept replaying the exchange with the man in her head, until one day, she decided to do something about it

Following the advice of a friend, she called the information offices of the Camino de Santiago and shared the whole story. She explained how she met a man during the walk. She said she didn’t have much information about him, but she knew he was from the Netherlands. She laughed when she admitted she didn’t even know his first name.

Fortunately, the person who answered the call had a soft spot for her situation. It took some digging, but by the time the phone call ended, the woman had the names and mailing addresses of four Dutchmen who finished the walk around the same time as her.

Later that day, after hours of trying to figure out what to do next, the woman hatched a plan. She spent the rest of her evening writing out four identical cards.

Years later, my father was walking the Camino de Santiago and stopped in a café outside of Leon, Spain. He began chatting with an elderly couple. After sharing a few glasses of wine together, my father asked the two of…

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Michael Thompson
Forge
Writer for

Co-creator of two cool kids with an equally cool woman • Word strategist • Storytelling coach • Free "story" guide: https://bit.ly/3h1KZeT