It’s Official: We’re Out of Things to Talk About

Isolation has been one long conversation, and we’ve reached the end of it. So, what’s next?!

Drew Magary
Forge

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Photo: Johner Images/Getty Images

How am I doing? Oh, I’m the same as I was last time you saw me here on this website. Isolated but comfortable. Bored but patient. Hopeful only when I don’t read the news. I got nothing to say to you, and I doubt you have much to say back.

I have been told over and over again — by brands, by celebrities FaceTiming from tastefully appointed kitchens, by viral Facebook postings — that we are still together even if we are apart, and that now is a good time to turn inward, to not push things, and to become reacquainted with those who are closest to you.

But my family and I did all that shit last month, and guess what? WE’RE FUCKING BORED AGAIN. I am reacquainted with everyone 100 times over now. So, what do I even talk about on these seemingly mandatory Zoom get-togethers with friends and extended family?

Because I’m sick of telling people, “We’re fine.” That’s true in the physical sense — my family is both healthy and practicing responsible sanitary habits. But, of course, “fine” is a placeholder word. It’s the new meh. It’s a word people use when they have nothing to say but think they need to say something anyway. I’m sick of talking…

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