What It Means to Be an Elder Orphan

I’m an elderly person with no children, siblings, or parents. I need more resources to navigate major life decisions.

Judy Colbert
Forge

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Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

I’m an “elder orphan,” a solo ager, someone who is aging alone. That may sound depressing until you learn that the American Geriatrics Society calls me and my ilk “unbefriended.” Yikes.

An elder orphan is someone “of an age” who has no immediate family in their life. No parents, spouse, siblings, children, or grandchildren. They may have immediate family, but the relatives live too far away to be of assistance in times of crisis. There’s another scenario, as in my case, where my immediate family and I are estranged.

This means there is no one to help me with major life decisions as I age, such as moving into a smaller home or to a warmer climate. There’s no one to take care of me when I’m sick or incapacitated (mentally or due to a fall or accident). No one to help manage daily chores, including shopping and writing checks to pay bills. In a worst-case scenario, someone who doesn’t know me might be tasked with making emergency medical decisions on my behalf, including choices I might not have made. Fortunately, I’m in fairly good health, and I see my doctors on a regular basis to help keep me that way. But still, I worry.

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