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What If This Is the Last Time?
Michael Thompson shares a way to stop yourself from getting wrapped in the frustrations of the moment and immediately feel more present. Ask yourself: What if this is the last time?
He means the last time doing whatever it is you’re doing: texting your partner to tell them they forgot to buy more paper towels, encountering your overly chatty doorman, standing in line and waiting to vote. Acting as if it’s your final opportunity to do such things, Thompson explains, can help you change your approach entirely and zone in on what matters.
When I became a mother, I started doing this naturally. It was partly a coping mechanism, I think. If my toddler refused to get into her pajamas yet again, to stop myself from resorting to my closet to rage-eat Oreos, I’d pause and think, “What if this is the last bedtime?” (Parenthood makes your brain work in slightly morbid ways—you get used to it.) Following this line of thinking would soften me. I’d look at my kid, maybe lie down with her and sing with her and think about how lucky I am—and then make her put on her damn PJs.
The fact is—and I think this is something 2020 is making annoyingly clear—everything is frail. (As I write this, several friends are evacuating their homes due to the Southern California wildfires.) Acknowledging the ever-present possibility of the “last time” is hard and sad, yes, truly. But it also allows us to hold onto the good while it’s here.
