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Why No One Thinks They’re Overreacting
There’s always a lot in someone else’s life that you can’t see
The other day, I finally decided to have a free session to discuss my new book, Making Numbers Count, with readers.
It was small and very informal — a group of people discussing numbers, asking about different ways to present data at work. Twenty minutes in, a woman, Lauren asked a question about an upcoming presentation.
“I only have one slide, but I have oodles of data. How do I choose what to put on the slide?”
It’s just the kind of question I spent the past few years researching and writing about. I had a few slides ready to screen share on the topic. I had studies to back it up. I had some wonderful examples to use that never made it into the book, and was really excited to share these with her. Helping people answer questions just like that was one of the reasons I decided to write the book and have a free session in the first place.
Instead, a guy named Peter answered the question.
So I just sat there.
At first, I thought, “oh, okay, this is like… a round table discussion. I’ll just play it cool.” But the other participants had asked me the question, not him. I did, eventually, get the chance to chime in.
Someone else asked another question.
Peter answered again.
What if Peter had spent a few years researching a topic, writing a book, and then decided to give some of his time to answer reader questions for free? And what if some random person jumped in and started answering questions?
A few hours later, after talking to a few people, I decided to send him a message:
I did just want to say that while I enjoyed having you, you answered a few questions that were directed towards me. I didn’t want to use the word mansplaining, so decided to wait and address it afterwards. It was informal and I’m sure you didn’t mean anything, but constantly having to face that makes me less likely to do these things in the…
