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The Scientific Way to Get Over a Breakup
Heartbreak can feel painfully specific, but research shows that it usually follows a typical pattern
After a breakup, your mind is probably filled with a jumble of thoughts, everything from “I’ll make the best of my regained freedom” to “my life is over.” (Sometimes, these thoughts pop-up within the same minute.) There’s self-doubt and pain, along with a constant feeling of “this sucks.”
Breakups do indeed suck. They suck for the person being dumped, and they suck for the person doing the uncomfortable deed. You’ve shared a life, dreams, a sense of identity. And the longer a relationship lasted, the harder it usually is to recover.
But taking a more scientific look at breakups — why and how they happen, what brings on the emotions that follow a split, the psychology of missing your ex — may offer an opportunity for self-analysis. It can give you some distance from the experience that often feels painfully specific.
Will your new scientific understanding magically make you feel better? Hardly. But heartbreak, perhaps, can be considered a melting pot of brain chemicals and predictable behaviors, and understanding its ingredients is a reminder than you’re not alone in your pain.
