The Kind Way to Cancel Your Thanksgiving Plans
In recent days, the nationwide surge in Covid cases has led scores of Americans to cancel their Thanksgiving travel plans. Yet, even with the big day right around the corner, not everyone has worked up the courage to break this news to Mom and Dad. And, well, the reasons why are fairly obvious.
In P.S. I Love You, the writer Crystal Jackson lays out a few ground rules for working up the courage to have a tough conversation. Though Jackson is writing about healthy conflict resolution within families, the advice applies to “potentially breaking Mom’s heart about your holiday change of plans,” too:
Speak up now, not later. The longer you wait, the harder it’ll get.
Speak from experience instead of a place of blaming or shaming. Maybe you’ve been following the news more carefully than your family. Share where you’re coming from.
Keep what you say kind and respectful. Even if your decision is met with disappointment, remember that it’s coming from a place of love. Try to avoid getting frustrated, even if your beloved parental unit has an affinity for laying on guilt trips.
You can cite the hard facts, too. On November 12, the U.S. reported more than 160,000 Covid-19 cases—the highest single-day count since the start of the pandemic. You can bring up the risks involved with travel, in addition to the risks posed by indoor gatherings made up of multiple households.
You can also present your family with a cautionary tale. Canada, which celebrates Thanksgiving in early October, saw a sharp spike in Covid cases beginning two weeks after the holiday—a time period consistent with the incubation period for the virus.
Some people may feel comfortable taking multiple precautions to go forward with a family get-together. It’s okay if you don’t. Stick to your guns, and your family will come around.
