The Dumb Dad Joke That Became My Failure Mantra
I use it to calm my perfectionism
Piano lessons were a rough point in my childhood. As with most young kids just starting to learn, my sticky little hands were pretty terrible at coaxing anything resembling music out of the keys. But where other kids might cheerfully bang away anyway or successfully convince their parents to let them quit, I threw myself into self-flagellation. After many lessons and practice sessions, I’d inevitably end up in tears, utterly convinced of my own stupidity.
But at some point, after the umpteenth time trying unsuccessfully to calm me down, my father — who was sitting next to me on the piano bench as I weepily slogged my way through a song — made a comment that has stuck with me ever since. “You know,” he said, “you’re also a terrible airplane pilot.”
This was true. And confusing, because yes, obviously — I mean, I was six. And a little mean, I thought to myself, because the last thing I needed at that moment was to hear about another thing I sucked at.
But that was the point. “You’re a terrible airplane pilot,” my dad continued, “because you’ve never learned how to fly a plane.”
Deep in my anxious brain, something clicked. I’d never learned to play the piano before, either. I was supposed to suck at this. It…
