It’s Okay to Still Not Be Okay
The world we lost seems to be roaring back to life. So why do you still feel like garbage?
This past Saturday, I stood in the middle of Chicago’s Andersonville neighborhood and watched as dozens of people danced, banged pots and pans, honked their car horns, and cheered in celebration of Joe Biden’s electoral victory. The good news of that day was swiftly followed by more good news — the hilarity of Giuliani’s Four Season’s Landscaping press conference, the wins in Georgia and Nevada, and then on Monday, Pfizer’s announcement of a 90% successful Covid vaccine.
Those few days felt bright and filled with possibility, as if the world we lost in 2016 had suddenly come roaring back to life. It was still a world beset with problems, but it felt like one where hard political work could make a dent in things, and lives could truly be saved.
Yet now, still in this same week, I feel a looming, soul-sick dread in the pit of my stomach. I don’t trust the hope I experienced just three days ago. I keep checking the news and imagining worst-case scenarios, caught up in an anxious pattern I can’t seem to escape. Why can’t I just be “okay”?
If you’re like me, you probably feel a bit guilty about having done “nothing” but watch election results all of last week, about not…
