How to Talk to Your Partner About Your Depression
Your partner might not know what to ask or how to help
My whole life I have suffered from a combination of anxiety and depression. After nearly twelve years of marriage, I had hardly spoken about it with anyone other than a handful of therapists. The challenges of parenthood only pushed me further away from my own understanding of the disorder, as both myself and my wife often went into full robot mode. It made life miserable at times, and it placed a thick cloud over our household. Three months ago I finally decided to talk to my wife.
It’s not that I was trying to fool her into thinking I was okay. That was a lost cause: When my depression was at its height, I had trouble managing a nine-to-five job or even ordinary social interactions. As a teenager, it took an intervention from my parents to finally get me to see a doctor. I’m now on medication that helps round out the edges, but I still have episodes of severe depression that last for weeks. During these times, the joy of everyday things is lost to me.
There are plenty of articles out there about how to help your depressed spouse. This is not one of them. This article is not for your partner — it’s for you. (Quick caveat: I am not a therapist or psychologist. If you are suffering from debilitating depression, please…
