Beyond Small Talk
How to Talk to Someone Whose Opinions You Can’t Stand
It’s a family gathering, not a debate you need to win
This story is part of How to Talk to Anyone, Forge’s guide to moving past the chitchat and truly connecting.
Everyone knows one: the person who loves to rehash recent elections when all you want is the gravy boat passed to you; who offers their “expert” opinion (gleaned from a single, stupid source) on the subject in which you earned your PhD; who refers to the candidate you just spent six months canvassing for by the most offensive nickname the pundits have summoned. And somehow, they’re always the loudest one in the room. We ache to lash out at them, to shout about the latest abuses, or to predict vindication at the polls. But we know that the only possible result is our own renewed agitation. The political landscape is ugly and likely getting worse; our personal lives don’t need to match.
Now look, I’m a pop culture historian, an author, and a professor, and I’m very active in local politics. I am the last person to suggest we avoid hard conversations. But I’ve learned over the past 41 years or so that there’s a time and place for a serious debate — and it’s not at a social setting with children and red wine present.
