Beyond Small Talk

How to Talk to Little Kids

‘Greetings, small human, how’s the weather down there?’ is probably not your best opener

Michelle Woo
Forge
Published in
5 min readNov 21, 2019

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Illustration: George(s)

This story is part of How to Talk to Anyone, Forge’s guide to moving past the chitchat and truly connecting.

YYou’re at a holiday gathering, scoping out the scene as the dignified adult you are, and you find yourself making eye contact with a young child. They stare at you for a beat, silently, and then ask whether you think Charizard can beat Squirtle.

You stand there, confused. You consider pivoting back to the table of assorted hummus dips, but you know that you should probably engage. The problem is you have no idea how.

I used to get uncomfortable talking to little kids. I was stumped by their out-of-the-blue questions, befuddled by their stories that don’t track, intimidated by their unpredictability. But after having kids of my own (and spending a lot of time exploring this topic), I’ve come to realize that conversations with children can be downright delightful, as long as you don’t lead with the dreaded “So, uh, how’s school?” I canvassed some other people I’ve deemed “good with kids” — fellow parents, friends, colleagues, and therapists. Here are their tips for how to talk to young children.

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Michelle Woo
Forge
Writer for

Author of Horizontal Parenting: How to Entertain Your Kid While Lying Down (Chronicle Books)