How to Start Dating Again Amid Grief
Who’s right for you? Should you only date fellow widowers? And when are you ready for sex?
There may be tears and fears and ghosts when you start — or attempt to start — dating after the loss of your partner. But I assure you, if you keep at it, it will get better.
I’ve learned a lot from my 11 years of not dating, dating, withdrawing from dating, dating again, not having sex, having sex, crying, laughing, and finally enjoying new partners. The emotions sometimes felt out of control, and I didn’t know which “me” to present to another person when I didn’t know which “me” was true or would be true the next morning.
Take every first date as an opportunity to practice dating again as you seek to resolve these quandaries.
How do I meet people?
There are basically two ways to meet potential dates. The first is to get out socially: Do the activities you enjoy, and try new activities that appeal to you. You’ll meet others who have interests in common.
- Advantage: If you don’t meet someone, you’ll still enjoy what you’re doing.
- Disadvantage: Even if you meet people who attract you, you have no idea whether they’re available or interested in dating you.
