How to Mourn a Person With a Complicated Legacy

Kobe Bryant’s death has raised difficult questions about how we express grief for imperfect people — that is, all of us

Luisa Colón
Forge

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A Los Angeles Lakers fan, Victor, mourns the death of retired NBA star Kobe Bryant. Photo: Rachel Luna/Getty Images

WWhen basketball legend Kobe Bryant was killed in a helicopter crash along with his daughter and seven other passengers, the international outpouring of grief was swift and passionate.

Bryant was many things to many people. He was an 18-time NBA All-Star with five championships and two Olympic gold medals. He was a businessman, a philanthropist, a father of four.

He was also charged with sexual assault in 2003. The case against him was dropped after his accuser refused to testify, but a civil suit was settled out of court, and Bryant later issued a public apology.

Since the news of the helicopter crash broke, the backlash against those who mention this chapter in Bryant’s life has been as passionate as the groundswell of admiration for him. A Washington Post reporter, Felicia Sonmez, was suspended after tweeting a link to a 2016 Daily Beast article about the rape case. Sonmez later reported receiving death threats.

These polarizing reactions raise an uncomfortable question: How do we mourn someone who leaves behind a complicated legacy?

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Luisa Colón
Forge
Writer for

Luisa Colón is a Brooklyn-based writer (BAD MOON RISING/2023, Cemetery Dance Publications), editor, and artist.