How to Learn From Harsh Criticism

Haters gonna hate (possibly including your boss). But with the right strategies, negative feedback can actually help you grow.

Melody Warnick
Forge

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Photo: JGalione/Getty Images

In the three years since my first book came out, I’ve never read a single Amazon or Goodreads review of it. Not one.

To be honest, my delicate ego can’t handle it. When an anonymous online writing critique or a two-star review titled “Disappointed” has the potential to upend my mental state, I figure it’s healthier to stick my fingers in my ears and take a la la la I can’t hear you approach to negative feedback.

That said, I also understand how refusing to hear or act on any criticism at all could become self-sabotaging. That’s because for most of us, having a boss, a client, a friend, or a partner point out our flaws is what gives us the self-knowledge and motivation we need to grow. Ultimately, learning to properly metabolize difficult feedback makes us better humans. And I know that if I can learn to take it well, it will make me a better writer, too.

How do you grow skin thick enough that criticism won’t undo you, but not so thick that you can’t absorb the feedback that can truly help? Here are a few expert strategies I came across in my quest to do just that.

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Melody Warnick
Forge
Writer for

Author of ThIs Is Where You Belong: The Art and Science of Loving the Place You Live (Viking, June 2016). http://amzn.to/1Qyp5Jb