How to Give a Toast That Everyone Will Remember Forever
Wedding? Parent’s anniversary? Boss’s retirement? The trick is a little research.
Some years back, two friends asked me to officiate their wedding. I agreed, feeling the usual mix of flattery and anxiety that accompanies such a request. Most of what I’d be expected to do was simple: get the Commonwealth of Massachusetts to ordain me as a minister for 24 hours, then put on a suit, stand before the couple and the guests, and follow what was essentially a script: Stand up, sit down, this person does a reading, now person brings the rings. But there was also what I, with 16 years of Catholic school under my belt, had come to refer to as “the sermon,” delivered right before the vows.
The wedding sermon, which was to be delivered right before the vows, was basically an uber-toast: longer than a normal toast, with significantly higher stakes and a less-forgiving (read: inebriated) audience. And it’s instructive for all toasts because it requires you to tell a good, well-structured, well-researched story. And all great toasts are stories.
We’ve all witnessed bad toasts. Some people just ramble through personal anecdotes for a period of what feels like several years in search of a point before inevitably dissolving into tears. Some speak directly to the…
