How to Deal When People Take Forever to Get to the Point

“Bridgesplaning” might be annoying, but sometimes it has a purpose

Rachel Sklar
Forge

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A photo of a slightly disgruntled woman looking at a man talk, waiting for him to finish.
Photo: georgeclerk/Getty Images

There’s a classic Saturday Night Live sketch called “The Chris Farley Show,” in which Chris Farley fumbles his way through an interview with the music legend Paul McCartney: “Remember when you were with the Beatles, and you were supposed to be dead?” asks Farley. “That was a hoax, right?”

“Yeah,” says a very alive McCartney.

In a sketch, it’s funny to keep going over something super-basic that everyone knows. It’s much less funny in real life when you are trying to get things done and someone else, instead of being useful, decides to tell you something that you didn’t ask for, don’t need, and very likely already know. But you sit there, serenely as Paul McCartney, because this person has information you need and you just have to suck it up and wait it out until they get there.

It’s not annoying for the same reasons that mansplaining is. This isn’t necessarily about condescension. It’s just about taking too damn long to get to the point. Call it bridge-splaining — where the stuff you already know is the bridge to the stuff you need to know but don’t. Think: your accountant, the pharmacist, your child’s pediatrician, your boss, your pedantic co-worker.

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Rachel Sklar
Forge

Writer, entrepreneur & activist. Founder of TheLi.st and Change The Ratio. Just here to elevate women & sing showtunes. Find me @rachelsklar on Twitter/Insta.