Member-only story
How to Be a Good Neighbor
Whether you’re just meeting or have lived next door for years
I was thrilled when new neighbors moved in across the hall a few months ago. In all the years I’d spent living in my building, I’d never really gotten to know any of the other residents, and I’d always regretted never making the effort. Here was a perfect opportunity to start fresh.
In an effort to be welcoming, I wrapped three fancy chocolate bars in yellow ribbon and enclosed a note introducing myself — and then promptly lost my nerve, worried that I would come off more overzealous than friendly. The chocolate bars sat on my kitchen table for one week. Then two weeks. Then long enough that it felt weird to deliver a welcome gift. Eventually, I gave up and ate them. To this day, we’ve never exchanged more than a polite hello in passing.
I’m far from the only one who’s struggled with this. In fact, research shows that fewer and fewer Americans are cultivating meaningful relationships with their neighbors. In the 1970s, nearly a third of Americans reported spending time with their neighbors at least twice a week, according to a recent report by the think tank City Observatory. Today, nearly a third of people report they’ve had no interactions with their neighbors at all.
