The Worst Mindset to Have When Fighting Racism
How perfectionism can undermine the work of dismantling White supremacy culture
In the aftermath of the murder of George Floyd in my neighborhood, I wrote about my experience as a White mother talking to my White children about race, justice, and how we can do what’s right. I shared how I was worried about getting these conversations wrong, but that I knew I had to start them anyway.
Many fellow parents reached out to me, all saying some version of the same thing: They, too, had been so worried about fumbling, and saying the wrong thing, and not being able to answer hard questions that they’ve avoided this conversation with their kids altogether. Seeing my own anxieties reflected back to me, I understood an important connection: perfectionism and White supremacy culture are inextricably linked.
This connection, of course, isn’t a brand-new one. In her 1997 landmark book Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?: And Other Conversations about Race, Beverly Daniel Tatum warned: “If…