Joint Accounts

Can I Talk My Son Out of Paying His Girlfriend’s Debt?

How to advise an adult child who’s about to make a money mistake

Illustration: Laurie Rollitt

Dear Joint Accounts,

My adult son and his girlfriend recently moved in together. They’re hinting at marriage and their relationship seems serious, but everyone is doubtful that it will last, because they also fight a lot and talk about breaking up.

Basically, they seem to be making impulsive decisions that aren’t very well thought out — the latest being that they want to put my son’s student loan on hold while they pay hers off. This means my son will only be paying the minimum amount on his loan while he helps his girlfriend pay hers off faster. The thing is, if they break up, I doubt the favor will be returned. How do I tell my son this is a terrible idea?

Sincerely,

Concerned Mom

I can understand why you’re concerned, and it sounds like you’re right to be: Your son seems to be making financial decisions based on emotion, not logic. He’s effectively investing in someone else’s future at the expense of his own. The longer he postpones paying his loan, the more expensive that loan will be. And if he and his girlfriend break up, all those extra dollars in interest he…