The New Self-Help
Why Women Deflect the Praise They Deserve
Shonda Rhimes breaks it down in ‘Year of Yes’
This story is part of The New Self-Help: 21 Books for a Better You in the 21st Century.
At a dinner celebrating women in the TV industry, Shonda Rhimes recalls in her book, Year of Yes, the emcee called out each honoree by name and spoke of her accomplishments. The response of each and every one of these accomplished women deflected or downplayed the praise.
“What is wrong with us?!” the TV mogul and legendary showrunner asks.
This vignette gets to the heart of Rhimes’ book, which traces her yearlong experiment of saying “yes” to opportunities and challenges that come her way. Yes, she’s embracing possibility. But central to this process is an acceptance of being seen as she is, and owning her story.
Rhimes’ determination to accept “any and all acknowledgements of personal fabulous awesomeness with a clear, calm, ‘Thank you’ and a confident smile and nothing more” is an invitation for us to do the same: To accept a compliment. To accept care. To receive kindness. To make leaps of faith.
Here are some of the key lessons she imparts along the way.
