A Behavioral Scientist’s Advice for Giving the Perfect Gift

Three misconceptions tend to get in our way

Margaret Echelbarger
Forge

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Close-up of woman sitting at the table and decorating gift box with ribbon for Christmas.
Photo: AnnaStills/Getty Images

This time of year, among all the new decisions we’re being forced to make — about canceling plans, about connecting via video chat, about the precautions that will protect us and our loved ones — one thing remains the same: We’re in the thick of gift-giving season. And holiday shopping is, in itself, a marathon of decisions.

I say this as someone who studies decision-making for a living: Finding just the right gift doesn’t have to be stressful. In fact, there’s plenty of behavioral-science research out there we can use to guide us. Rely on these insights to save yourself some angst while sparking joy in the people you love most — and feel more connected in the process.

Misconception 1: It has to be a surprise

Pulling off the perfect surprise gift shows someone how well you know them or demonstrates that you were listening when they made that offhand comment while passing a store window. And it’s a gift in itself to see the joy on someone’s face as they open something they weren’t expecting.

But making it a goal to surprise someone for its own sake can be more stressful than it’s worth. In one 2011 study, researchers from Harvard and Stanford…

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