9 Reasons to Ask More Questions

Reclaiming your inquisitive nature can make life better in a few critical ways

Diane Stopyra
Forge

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Photo by rawpixel

I have a three-year-old nephew who, like a lot of three-year-olds, asks a great deal of questions: Can you drive faster? What do plants eat? Why can’t we poop in the tub? Sure, it’s cute, even if it’s also a little exasperating. But for adults who’ve lost that inquisitive nature — which is, ahem, most of us — it should also be aspirational.

Asking questions isn’t just a useful mechanism for getting the salt passed to you at the dinner table. It’s also an undervalued skill set. And while it may sound strange to describe such a simple rhetorical device this way, that’s exactly how psychologists think of it: as a remarkably powerful strategy for improving one’s life in surprising, sometimes counterintuitive ways.

The problem is most adults treat asking questions like we treat touching the door handle of a public restroom: sometimes necessary, but also unpleasant and best avoided whenever possible. One 2013 survey found that four-year-old girls are the most prolific askers, averaging one question every minute and 56 seconds — but it’s not uncommon for that same girl to ask zero questions per day by the time she hits junior high.

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Diane Stopyra
Forge

Journalist writing and surfing in Cape May, NJ. Work in Runner’s World, Marie Claire, Salon, The Cut, and more. Reluctant tweeter at @dianestopyra.